(Written in July 2015, but has been mis-placed in blog by website)
As I was writing my blog, Change Goin’ Come, July 22nd my sister was dying at home. After a long battle with renal failure from type one diabetes, she passed away quietly at home with our mother. I received the call only moments after shutting my laptop. I struggled with my bags to leave the hotel, and cried on and off hysterically through the airport, like a mad woman. When I finally reached home, I was filled with a sense of emptiness and disbelief. I shared a bag of double stuffed Oreos with my mom, and talked for hours about what had finally come to pass. We knew her time was limited, but she had been so lively the past few months. We thought we had more time. If I have gained anything from this, it is that we need to enjoy the present. My sister was only three years my senior, full of life and an insane will to live. She had almost died two years previously of a massive stroke, so my family felt fortunate to have had extra time to share with one another. We were indeed closer in the end, and for that I am thankful.
I spoke of a fortune teller in my last blog, and again I have to share an interesting tidbit. I asked the fortune teller, when my sister was forty-three, how long she would live. The fortune teller told me she saw the number forty-four. I dreaded that entire year for my sister until it passed. I just realized the day after she died, that I am forty-four…. Interpretation is a precarious thing.
Two days after my sister passed, my writing partner suffered a death in her family as well. We have several publishing offers, and are stricken with grief. It’s like Christmas morning, but you can’t open any of the presents. As trying as this all is,my wedding is also near. I thought of postponing the date, but my sisters were both very excited. Though my heart is sad, it is still very much in-love.
I hope in my grief I will write something to truly make my sister proud.